JennMelton's Blog

A Past Season Of Regret and God's Grace

2011-09-06T22:51:00.000-07:00

A Former Teacher and Daycare/Preschool Director Reflects On Her Mistakes

We all have areas in our past that we regret and while I am fully reconciled to God and my family, I felt it timely to share with you some of mine.
After receiving a Bachelor's degree in Education, I jumped right into a career of full-time public school teaching. After five years of teaching I learned that the church we were attending in Flagstaff was evaluating whether or not to start of a preschool/ daycare program.

The Ark Daycare and Preschool
I found myself ready for a change, so I transitioned from the public sector into the private sector and was thrilled to be in the more "protected" environment of a church. I was on the start-up committee and was highly instrumental in the decisions that were made for the creation of this preschool/ daycare.

Zachary and Momma sharing a special moment together.

I remember vividly one meeting with the pastors and a few ladies of the church where we discussed the mission behind this program. All of us with the exception of one lady had the expectation that this preschool/ daycare would serve to meet the needs of families with two working parents. It seemed like an ideal situation to have a safe and secure place to bring your child as early as 6 weeks of age. We promised to use a Christian curriculum beginning with our infant room all the way to our preschool room.

Sending the Wrong Message to Moms
The lady who opposed the idea was a mother of three children and she shared that it would be better to carry out a Mom's Day Out program that would give stay-at-home moms a little break once a week for a few hours. She was concerned that by offering a traditional daycare program that we would be advocating moms in the workplace.

I regretfully recall my response and the response of those around me. I shared that we had done some polling and it was quite evident that there was a need for daycare/ preschool services in our community and despite the ideal of a mother staying home it was not realistic in our expensive community to do so. With this we proceeded forward with no further dissension. The preschool and daycare opened up in August 2001.

Zachary is Born and Everything Changes
About a year into my role as the Director of the preschool

Zachary and Daddy at a campground near Show Low, AZ.

and daycare I became pregnant with Zachary. It was assumed that I was in the best position because he would be able to come to work with me and we would be close throughout the day.

No one can prepare a childless young woman for the bond that develops between a mother and her child after birth. All of my "so-called" ideals from before were thrown out the door.I brought Zachary into my office and kept him there with me the majority of the time while doing my work. He was strapped onto me or on my lap as I worked throughout the day.

Sending Mixed Messages
This was successful for awhile but then I had my evaluation with one of the pastors at the church. The evaluating pastor was a woman, which is unbiblical, who could not have children or chose not to have children. Even though I was running an "incredible program," she shared that there was one area that needed to be addressed: Zachary needed to be in the infant room. She said that it sent mixed messages to prospective enrolling families when they saw that I didn't allow my own child to be in the infant room.

Baby Zachary

My heart ached.Sure, I was the one in charge and was the one that hired and fired the staff for all of the rooms, so I should have complete peace over handing my son over. I was just down the hall and could check in at any time. Also, Brad worked at the same church as the Youth and College Minster, so he could stop in as well. Why couldn't I just relax and count it as a blessing? The reason is that it was contrary to the role that God designed me for.

No More Pep Talks for Mothers
For years as a kindergarten teacher and now as a preschool/ daycare director I gave some of the greatest pep talks to parents while shuttling them out of their child's presence in the mornings.The moms would drop their child off for the first several times in tears and I would assure them that it was completely normal but that if they made it a quick separation that it would be best for both of them.I shared that their child would be fine within 15 minutes of their leaving and by most standards they were.The tears were gone and they were distracted by the activity and other children around them.

But now as a mother I knew that there was a reason that all mothers have this ill feeling of neglect when leaving their child on a regular basis to pursue a career.No amount of explaining would appease me. I needed to figure out a way to be with my Zachary.

Momma holding Zachary

A New Vision
Not having this vision for our family until now threw our budget for a loop. We crunched the numbers on paper and there was just no way that I could quit working. We did manage to have me cut back to ¾ time and then I brought on an assistant director. This helped but it didn't alleviate the problem. When Zachary was 15 months old I had to have a tonsillectomy which kept me home for nearly three weeks to recover. He was with me for the majority of the time despite the intense pain. I just couldn't bear to be apart from him.

During this time I felt such a peace over being with him full-time and struggled to see how I would manage to return to work.After many tears, Brad decided that we would try going to ½ time and see how we did. Again it helped but the problem wasn't solved.Things got worse over time especially after walking past the infant room and seeing one of my staff members spanking a 15 month old.

My emotions were unleashed.This was someone that I trusted and she had taken it upon herself to spank another person's child out of frustration!How often had this happened?What was I going to do?I shed several tears over this, but kept my professionalism and solved the matter. Even so, there was no way things could continue as they had been.

Zachary eating

A New Start
Brad decided it was time for him to look for new employment in an area of the state that was more affordable. I was eager to be home and had no qualms over picking up and moving to a new community.

In December 2003, Brad accepted the position of Youth Pastor at a large church in Prescott. On Christmas Eve we squeezed into a small two-room duplex in Prescott Valley. To make ends meet on one income, we sold a motorhome and our second car and shared one vehicle between the two of us.Eating regularly at restaurants was now a thing of the past and clipping coupons was a new hobby.Despite the challenges we felt at peace in knowing that I was finally caring for Zachary at home as God had intended.

No Regrets!
There isn't a day that goes by that I regret having made the decision to stop working outside the home in order to care for Zachary.My only regret is that it took us 18 months to make it happen. In fact, I honestly don't think there would be one mother that would ever say, "I wish that I had focused on my career more when the children were home." It just doesn't happen.

What we do hear from many moms though is how they wish that they had devoted themselves without any distractions to the raising of their children.These moms are now in a special place where they can encourage new moms to stay home with their children based on their experience of having done the opposite.

So, how do I feel about having promoted daycare and preschool programming? Saddened over that past failure to truly seek out the Lord's direction. Had I taken even a brief moment and ignored the polling of the world around me that screamed "We need childcare for working moms!"and sought out God, I would have seen so very clearly that the responsibility of raising children is not one that should be abrogated by parents and delegated to others.

Although only a new believer at the time, Brad has also admitted his lack of leadership in this area and apologized to me for it. Today we are solidly on the same page and we have made numerous sacrifices to make sure that I can focus my energies on the work God has called me to do at home.
I am so thankful for God's mercy and grace in my life. We all make mistakes and so long as we come to Him with a repentant heart He generously will pour out his forgiveness on us.Thank you, Lord Jesus!

Zachary at age 9

Homeschooling in the Melton Home

2011-07-19T15:42:00.000-07:00

What is homeschooling like for us? With my past experiences as a public school teacher and virtual school administrator/teacher and now with my experience as a homeschool mom, I am often asked questions on homeschooling. If I could sum it all up in one phrase I think I would point to Deuteronomy 6:4-9. The reason we homeschool is to obey God’s mandate to raise our children in the faith.

I can so easily get wrapped up in choosing whether to use washable or non-washable markers; glue sticks or glue bottles; reserving library books; stocking up on 15¢ notebooks; scheduling fieldtrips; scope and sequences; daily, weekly and yearly schedules; organizing materials in cubbies and a myriad of other things. All of these things play a role in our schooling but if they become so time and energy consuming then I have missed the entire point.

Here’s a glimpse into a typical day for us:
7:00ish Wake Up---We are late risers compared to most but that is one of the many privileges of homeschooling. There’s no bus to catch and no lunches to pack, so we can have a leisurely morning.

8:00ish Breakfast---I usually make up some eggs and turkey bacon or oatmeal. If the price is right we’ll have some cereal, but it’s ridiculously expensive to get the non-GMO stuff right now.

Get ready--- Everyone has the responsibility to make their bed and get dressed for the day. I usually help out Madison, but there are times when she dresses herself and I just sit back and delight in her willingness to take on that task. Who knew that an inside out red shirt, pink dress, and blue pantaloons could be such a fashion statement?

9:00ish Morning Devotions and Catechism--- To try and keep God as our central focus, we begin our day around the school table where I lead our Bible study. Right now we’re working on the Ten Commandments and I have some coloring sheets, a song to sing and some stories to teach with. We also take this time to work through our catechism using the Truth and Grace Memory Books. We used to do this in our evening family worship time but found that it was getting too lengthy. We close with a prayer that God would bless and multiply our efforts throughout the day.

10:00ish School--- Here’s the time when we work through our individual Bible study, reading, writing, spelling, math, geography, science and history. This current school year I have done some juggling with separate curriculums for Jonathan and Zachary, but as Jonathan develops into a strong reader we will be combining all of the subject material while making adjustments for their varying levels.

I’m going to take a minute here to share one area that I was struggling with earlier this year in case anyone finds themselves in the same position. As moms we watch our children grow and mature throughout the years and with homeschooling we begin their schooling with a strong role for ourselves. We are the ones doing all of the reading and pointing to the workbook pages, leading the experiments and so on. Trying to do this “Mama-driven” schooling with an 8, 6, and 3-year-old was a real challenge. I went to a dear friend that has had more experience in schooling multiple children (in fact she has 7) and her words were so helpful to me. She recognized that I was not letting Zachary take on responsibility in his schooling. I changed things the following day and my life is sooooo much more manageable. Zachary is pleased with the independence and opportunity to show his maturity while Jonathan and Madison appreciate my attention without long interruptions. Every day I provide a written checklist/ schedule for Zachary that outlines his assignments for the day. Because I am not sitting beside him and hearing him read through each of his texts I now have him write me a short letter at the end of his school day where he shares what he has learned. I check over his work and we work together if he is struggling in an area. I still sit with Jonathan for his reading and writing time to ensure that he is developing into a more solid reader, but there are many times that I can get him started on his math and leave him to work independently while I spend some time with Madison. Because Madison is younger, her schooling is less formal. I have some packets that I made up years ago for preschoolers and I use these with her to develop her fine motor skills and phonemic awareness. We use scissors, trace pictures, make little booklets, read and sing songs. I have trained Madison to work quietly on an activity close by me while it is school time and it has been a blessing.

12:30ish Lunch---We are usually finished with our schooling at this point but there are times when we have been a bit sluggish and we have to carry on with school following lunch. We’ll enjoy our lunch together (Daddy usually joins us) and then move onto the remainder of the day. The rest of the day is far more flexible with a possible trip to the library, run to the grocery store, meeting with friends, cleaning the house, working outside in the yard, playing with our puppy, reading books individually or together, or resting while listening to the Bible on CD.

5:00ish Dinner---It is important to us that we eat dinner together every night as a family. We’ve chosen not to participate in team sports or other activities for a variety of reasons and one of these is that a family with multiple children can be pulled apart almost every night of the week. In addition to our normal routine we also like to engage in Biblical hospitality. The Bible commands believers to engage in hospitality and it talks about how the early church went house to house during the week. We apply these principles by hosting other families in our home for dinner, fellowship, and worship at least once or twice a week. It is such a delight to invite other families over to develop relationships, strengthen the body of Christ, and worship God.

6:00ish Take a walk or spend some time outdoors. Even with the hot weather, we find ourselves drifting outside around this time of day. The grass seems to be calling the children to run, the trees are asking to be climbed, and the trampoline wants to be jumped on. This is a restful time of the evening being surrounded by God’s handiwork.

My husband loves history and he sometimes reads a book to the family on various topics from Christopher Columbus and Lewis and Clark to Heroes of the Faith. He’ll find other books at the library to supplement the reading with pictures and he’ll even follow the progress of the people in the story with a wet erase marker on a laminated map or by opening an atlas. The boys really enjoy when Daddy does this.

7:00ish Family Worship--- This is led by Daddy. There are times when we’ll all surround the patio table outside and sing songs, read the Bible, apply the passage to our lives, and pray together as a family. Other times we’ll move inside and sit on the couches in the family room. Regardless, this is a very important time in our day to regroup as a family and set our hearts on the Lord, which is why we do it every evening except for Sunday.

8:00ish Prepare for bed.

I mentioned at the beginning of this schedule that this was a typical day but as I reflect there are often days that don’t measure up to this timeline. It isn’t rare for our time with friends to last until 10 or 11 at night, so we might find ourselves sleeping in the following morning. Regardless of the circumstances all of the events take place daily. We do take breaks throughout the year as needed and have decided to work through the summer months since moving to Buckeye. Who really wants to be outside in this heat??? A fabulous perk to homeschooling is that we are not bound by a schedule that someone else created- we can choose to take a vacation day or week anytime we choose to. This also helps in getting cheaper off-season rates!

My thoughts about Homeschooling
So, how do I feel about homeschooling? Really feel? I really count it a privilege to be called by God to instruct my children during the day. Many women wonder if it is a burden and think that I would need a break from it all. It’s not like a typical job where you are craving for the clock to strike 5:00 or for your vacation days to set in. These are my own children and there is such an investment that I don’t feel a need to quit. There are so many rewards in being able to see concepts “click” and watching as they develop their walk with the Lord. There is nothing sweeter than watching a child read his Bible independently and spend time in prayer.

Are there times when I feel like I want to pull my hair out? Sure. We all have those moments. Most of the time when I feel like this it is when I have forgotten that I have two boys. Boys are different from girls. Period.

Homeschooling boys
Boys need to move around. Asking one of my sons to sit in the same chair for thirty minutes without fidgeting would be torture. I have come to recognize that a mini trampoline and big exercise ball are wonderful tools in a homeschool. When my son gets antsy and the learning seems to be coming to a screeching halt, I have him go to the trampoline and jump one hundred times. He comes back ready to learn again. Even sitting on the exercise ball while schooling helps as he is able to use his lower body muscles to stabilize the ball while working with his upper body on the assignment I have given him. We also change the scenery. I like to give my children ownership of their schooling in areas that are not critical. Having the choice to do reading on the couch, bed, table or even under a table seems like a big deal to my sons. If that’s all it takes to provide motivation, I’ll keep doing it.

Fieldtrips
What are some of my favorite non-essentials of our schooling? Fieldtrips. I love fieldtrips. We’ve had opportunities to tour a fire station, visit the zoo, visit the Botanical Gardens, go for hikes, see a printing press, tour a city sanitation/ recycling department, play at area parks with friends. I have a long list of fieldtrips which I hope to get scheduled soon. Some things we do with our own family and others we invite friends to join us. We are hoping to start more mission-minded fieldtrips such as serving in the local foodbank to fill food boxes or to help out at a women’s shelter sorting clothing. Some of the other families in our church also take their older children out evangelizing once a month. These opportunities to be in the world as a family are priceless. We can share our faith together and hold one another up.

So, what is homeschooling like for us? It is a God-driven adventure that we undertake as a family every day. There is no other application of Deuteronomy 6:4-9 that comes close to fulfilling the requirements as does homeschooling and there is no other form of education that provides such blessings!

Shoes and Pantaloons- Lessons on Modesty

2011-02-22T21:07:00.000-08:00

Today in America we have lost the concept of modesty. Nothing is kept hidden anymore. It doesn’t take much to be bombarded by bare shoulders, bare thighs and often nearly-bare chests and bottoms. (And that is just at the local junior high school.) Someone once said “I feel that if you’ve got it, you should flaunt it.” in reference to how her young daughter dressed. She has no problem in allowing her daughter to wear mini-skirts and tight fitting clothing. But why should she? She herself wears jeans that are so tight that nothing is left to the imagination.

And behold, the woman meets him, dressed as a prostitute, wily of heart. Proverbs 7:10 ESV

I have to wonder when Solomon wrote this proverb what the visual was of a woman dressed as a prostitute and how that might compare to the average American woman today.

My question is why? Why and when did this change take place? Why are we so desensitized to this? I reflect back on my own life and while I was brought up in a rather conservative Christian home I still chose to wear clothing that was not entirely modest. I readily admit that I wore clothing that I thought would make a statement or attract attention. How I wish I could go back and change those days. But we are all under the refining hand of God and our eyes are blind to His will at times in our lives.

Likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire, but with what is proper for women who profess godliness—with good works. I Timothy 2:9-10 ESV

As I have matured in my walk I have felt convicted over the years to wear clothing that is functional, feminine and modest. Some may have differing standards as to what types of clothing are “allowed” or “forbidden” which is perfectly fine. While I choose to rarely wear pants because I find skirts to be more feminine and modest, I completely understand that there are other women that may choose to wear pants. Looser fitting pants can be modest in my opinion but tight jeans just don’t fit in line with “respectable apparel”.

On the rare occasion that we venture into a mall with our children we are usually heard saying “shoes” several times. It’s our shortened way of saying “look down at your shoes- there’s something immodest that you should keep your eyes away from”. It works perfectly with everyone obediently looking down (even Daddy does this) until we pass by the area. I seriously doubt that my young boys would actually get a thrill out of viewing a scantily dressed woman nor do I believe that my little girl would care to imitate it in her own dress but we are going to do all that we can to protect their innocence.

Our little girl loves wearing dresses as do most little girls. It is only with time and the pressures of society that girls begin to complain and conform to the feminist and liberal agendas seeking to wear masculine and/or immodest apparel. I have heard it over and over again, when people see Madison that once she gets older she won’t have anything to do with dresses. How sad to think that she would willingly choose to cast off her femininity and modesty! Yet I am comforted in seeing a resurgence of young ladies that continue to hold fast to the standards that they were brought up with.

“A woman shall not wear a man's garment, nor shall a man put on a woman's cloak, for whoever does these things is an abomination to the Lord your God. Deuteronomy 22:5 ESV

Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body. I Corinithians 6:19-20 ESV

Does a dress always constitute modesty? Not at all- there are dresses that are tight and short and the way a dress is worn can certainly cause some issues. For example, nearly every little girl I know loves to twirl around with their dresses high at their sides. It’s just part of girlhood. The only problem is that the faster they turn the higher the dress goes. Then there are the gymnast girls that tumble around or climb up playground equipment with no care in the world. Unfortunately, we live in a sick world where some people get their thrills by seeing private areas of even the youngest of girls. What’s a girl to do? It’s so simple but often neglected nowadays. Make up a few pairs of pantaloons. Their full shape lends itself to modesty and the lacey bottoms make a little girl smile.

Here are some directions and photos for the pantaloons that I make. I realize that there are patterns out there but I am a basic sewer and this makes it simpler for me. I can put together a pair of pantaloons in about an hour. The best part is that these are super cheap to make if you use old sheets. The only thing left to buy is a bit of elastic and lace for frills. If you happen to have a friend with a serger (hint-hint to all my friends) then try and have a pantaloon making party- it’ll go even faster and you’ll have a great time doing it. Happy sewing!

Pantaloon Directions
Step 1: Take a pair of pants that fit your daughter. Fold in half and use as a template to cut out of the sheet adding at least 2 inches all the way around. Make two panels.
Step 2: Fold over the ends so there will be minimal fraying and sew.
Step 3: Measure lace to match up with the end of the pant leg. Sew onto the bottoms on both panels.
Step 4: Fold over leg panel wrong side out and sew from the end up to the seat and stop there. Do this on both legs.
Step 5: Turn one panel right side out leaving the remaining one wrong side out. Insert the right side out one into the wrong side out panel. Just stuff it in there and then straighten it out so the pieces match up in length.
Step 6: Sew up the seat up to the waist being sure to go through both panels.
Step 7: Pull the inserted panel out and now you have a pair of pants ready for trimming.
Step 8: Measure your daughter's waist and ankles with elastic and cut allowing about an extra inch.
Step 9: Make a simple casing for the elastic around the waist and ankles. Insert elastic through using a safety pin for help.
Step 10: Dress up your little girl and let her dance, dance, dance!!!!

Your Place or Our Place?

2011-01-11T14:19:00.000-08:00

What comes to mind when you hear the word hospitality? Some may think of hotel staff that provides a warm greeting to the new arrivals that are ready to check in. Others may think of restaurant staff that is eager to seat you at a table so you can order food. But what about hospitality in our homes and churches?

I was beginning to think that it had all but disappeared until this past year. We’ve attended several churches over the past 15 years and while we’ve invited others into our home for food and fellowship it was only on rare occasions that it was reciprocated. This left us feeling isolated and longing for true friendships that went beyond the “’How are you?’ ‘I’m fine’” stage.

How is it that we can be in churches with 300+ people and yet we don’t really know one another? I honestly believe it is because we have put church into this little box and we don’t allow it to spill over into other areas. Do you remember the little fingerplay:

“Here is the church.” (hands clasped together with fingers tucked inside.)
“Here is the steeple.” (forefingers taken out and put up.)
“Open the door and see all the people.” (invert hands and wiggle fingers to represent the people.)

That little rhyme has it all mixed up. The church is not simply the structure that people go to but instead it is the believers that come together. The fingerplay would be better if it said: “Here is the building. Here is the steeple. Open the door and see all the church.” For this reason we have tried to be more deliberate in our speech when we are talking to our children and instead of saying “We’re going to church.” We say “We’re going to be with the church.” Of course, it’s not a big deal to mix up the phrases but it is important that we always remember what the church is.

Over this past year we have been in and out of the homes of so many members of the church (both from our local church body and others) and have had the privilege of hosting many in our home as well. There are so many joys to be had over a simple dinner, games and sharing family worship with others. It takes us beyond the rote conversations and digs deeper where relationships begin to grow. We were once feeling starved for friendships and now we are so blessed that we couldn’t even imagine moving away from Phoenix (despite my longing for green).

There are many excuses that we make to not have others over and I thought that I would take a moment to address some of them.
• The number one excuse is simply a lack of intention. When you have that conversation on Sunday with the person sharing the pew with your family and they say “We should get together sometime” stop right there and make plans for that current week to actually get together. So often we say that we want to see someone but week after week goes by and then we simply stop saying it because it’s a bit embarrassing to say it once more. Mean what you say and say what you mean.
• We are simply too busy. It’s a common fact that Americans are busy and we are great about overloading our schedules with sport practices and games, music rehearsals and concerts, and church programming. If we say that we are too busy then it is time to do something about that and begin eliminating activities that draw us away from our home. Carve out at least one night a week that is open for having people over.
• We don’t have the space or a home of our own. I can absolutely sympathize with this statement and can share what we have done to overcome. Don’t feel limited to the walls where you reside to invite people into. Arrange for dinner at a local park or consider meeting at a cheap restaurant. We have also been known to bring all of the ingredients for dinner over to a friend’s house and prepare it there.
• Funds are tight and we can barely feed our family let alone feeding someone else’s every week. Don’t worry- no one seems to have money these days and beans and rice go a long way. Here’s one of our favorite meals that stretches the food easily:

Chipotle Chicken with Beans and Rice

 Cook dried pinto beans in a pressure cooker for 25 minutes and place in a bowl.
 Cook brown rice for 30 minutes on stovetop.
 Toss in four or five boneless skinless chicken breasts or thighs (you can usually get these on sale for $0.99/lb) into pressure cooker.
 Puree a can of chipotle peppers and spoon in about a third of it onto the chicken. (Freeze the rest for future vistors.)
 Slice up an onion and throw that on top of the chicken along with some cumin and fresh garlic and a cup of broth.
 Pressure cook for 15 minutes and viola your chicken is ready to be shredded up with a fork.
 Tear up some lettuce and have everyone pile the beans, rice and chicken on top along with tortilla chips, salsa, sour cream, cheese and avocado (on sale typically for $0.25 each).

We rarely serve a dessert (sometimes people who are coming over offer to bring one) and always have water with our meals, so there is no additional expense.
• No one has ever invited us over. Start a new trend in your church and talk to your pastor about the importance of hospitality. Maybe you can get him on board and the church can get some motivation straight from the pulpit!
• I wouldn’t know what to do with visitors. This is the fun part! Have fun! Learn a new game. We love playing card games but there are tons of great games to be discovered. Visit Goodwill (my favorite store) and pick up a game super cheap.
o Do Family Worship together. We make it a goal to share our family worship with anyone that comes over in the evening. We stick to the same routine but just add them in so they can choose a favorite song and pray with us.
o Do an activity together. The past couple of years I have coordinated a Gingerbread decorating event for friends. The only problem is I don’t have a home of my own to host this in. So what’s to be done? I asked a dear friend if we could use her home and she was thrilled to help out with this. Now, several parents and their children get together with ooey gooey icing and candy treats to create masterpieces while making a joyful noise in singing.

Showing hospitality isn’t just a matter of courtesies that we ought to extend to one another but it is something that God specifically chose to show us in His Word. For instance in 1 Peter 4:9 we are told “Be hospitable to one another without grumbling.” In the Bible hospitality is often in the form of proving lodging for the traveling teachers. This need is still here and I am thankful for the times when Brad has had to travel distances to teach that made it where he couldn’t make it back to our home that night and someone in the congregation offered him a place to stay. These overnight visits provided him a respite before starting the journey back home and at the same time he has gained friendships with the host families. Even if you are unable to host someone for an entire night, God still directs “Let brotherly love continue.” Hebrews 13:1. What better way to show brotherly love than to extend hospitality.

This is the perfect time for launching out in hospitality. Look around your church and see if there is a widow or older couple that may enjoy having dinner with you. Could there be a new young family in your church that just moved across the country and has no extended family close by? You could be an “adopted” aunt, uncle or even grandparent! Consider inviting a church leader and his family over for fellowship. Remember, they need friends too. Start filling in your calendar and you will soon see your heart filling with brotherly (and sisterly) love!

Making Homemade Tortillas

2010-10-15T15:01:00.000-07:00

We had a super time making our own tortillas when studying about Mexico. I can't tell which were the cheesiest- the tortillas or the smiles on Jonathan and Madison!

On a side note- while it was a fun project, I think I am content to allow Costco to keep providing me with the uncooked tortilla dough. These are hard to roll thin.

How to Get Boys to Use Soap

2010-10-15T14:18:00.000-07:00

I finally discovered the best way to get my boys to use soap. Give them a knife! Okay, my boys really aren't that repulsed at the thought of being clean but they definitely had a great time carving soap. We've been studying Canada and one of our projects was to carve as the Inuit did. Here's some pictures of our polar bears.

Studying Mexico

2010-09-21T22:14:00.000-07:00

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We are exploring countries and cultures in our homeschooling this year in our schooling. How eye-opening it is to see what other cultures believe in. We have been convicted on how important it is to pray for our brothers and sisters throughout the world. We live in a country that for the time being affords us great freedoms to worship the one true God while there are so many around our world that are persecuted in the harshest ways. Today we studied Mexico and had some fun making our own pinata. I must admit by the time we finished it looked pretty sad but it was a fun experience!

How to Spend Boy's Energy- Tip from Jenn

2010-09-21T22:09:00.000-07:00

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I write this somewhat ashamed of myself but also humored. A few weeks ago the boys were full of energy and needed to burn off some it. They asked if they could cut the grass so I said "Sure, grab some scissors and your hats." The obedient boys that they are (most of the time) grabbed their scissors and hats fully armed to tackle the grass. I grabbed Brad so he could see and the great Daddy that he is saved them from the scissor cutting and gave them the adventure of the lawn mower.

It's a Mudfest!

2010-09-21T21:19:00.000-07:00

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Here's a fun glimpse into the life of Jonathan. If given the choice to play with a storebought toy or to go outside and play in the mud, he will always choose the mud. Go figure!

Why Church should be like my French Class

2010-08-07T11:41:00.000-07:00

I recently reflected back to my high school years when I was sitting in my French class learning the basics of the language. Parlez-vous français? I took two years of that class and I can’t remember a bit of it. I will be honest and share that I had to Google “Do you speak French?” just so I could add it to the blog. I did know some French while I was in the class and could carry on some very elementary conversations within the classroom, but the minute I left that setting it dwindled and as the years have passed my ability to speak French has become extinct. I don’t blame this on my teacher, in fact, she was pretty good and pushed us to learn more. I remember the first day of class and how she never spoke one word of English until just before the bell rang for dismissal. I was completely lost at first but as the time progressed I found that I was picking up on things and I had a desire to figure out what she was saying so the next day would be easier. I began learning the greetings like “Bonjour” and “Salut.” The teacher continued to speak in French the majority of the time and I quickly advanced to full sentences. So, why exactly am I commenting on this? It got me thinking about the typical American church and how different it is from that French class.

Church today has lost its identity. No longer does it seem that the church is meant for the believers as it was in Acts. Instead we get watered-down messages that make everyone feel comfortable and “meets them where they are” instead of challenging them to conform their lives to God’s Word. Now, if my French class had been like that, my teacher would have never spoken to us in French other than teaching a couple of words every day and even with that she couldn’t have done very many because who knows if there would have been a visitor that missed the previous lesson? So, she would just stay in the same first lesson teaching the greetings of French day after day after day while the class became stale and stifled and decided that it was time to try out another teacher. So, the class moves onto a new teacher that teaches a couple of different words, but he too can’t risk losing anyone so he doesn’t pick up the pace and advance the class. He throws in a couple of fieldtrips to a French restaurant and musical, which appeals to most everyone so his class is more popular but overall there is no growth in speaking the language amongst the students. It’s just a social activity where everyone is at ease.

Just take a minute and pretend that you were paying this teacher to tutor your child? Would you be okay with this? Absolutely not! You want results! You want your child to know the French language! So, why then are we so accepting of this non-challenging attitude in our own churches where we are more afraid of offending than speaking truth? Why do we accept the hearing of the same “feel good” messages week after week? Why do we get upset if a pastor dares to speak directly from God’s Word and it convicts us? I have heard people say that pastors need to be careful with their messages because there may be unbelievers there. Don’t get me wrong, I have no problem with unbelievers coming to visit a church, but I certainly don’t want to see a church catering to its visitors, so that the message is weak and lacks conviction.

We are blessed to be a part of a church that preaches boldly from the Bible with no apology. If you are also in a Biblical church, take a minute and thank your pastor for preaching the whole counsel of God (Acts 20:27). I assure you, there is much condemnation and pressure to conform to the worldly church for those in ministry and your words of encourage go a long way. If you find that you are sitting comfy in the pews week after week then you ought to take time to consider whether you should find a new church home because none of us have arrived at completion, so we should all be growing closer in Christ’s likeness. Au revoir!

How to Survive the Heat? Swim Modestly

2010-07-12T14:26:00.000-07:00

It is hot, hot, hot here in Phoenix and the pool seems to be a necessity in our lives. Over the years I have felt more and more convicted on the clothing that I wear and what image I portray through it. I have always preferred to wear clothing that was more feminine by nature such as skirts or dresses and I have chosen to be more modest. But exactly how does someone combine swimming, femininity and modesty? In the past I have worn a suit with an attached skirt but it still seemed too revealing for me. I've tried t-shirts and shorts but those end up clingy and heavy in the water. After years of trying to find a modest suit that I could actually afford I found it and thought that I would share it with you in case you have the same convictions.

The seamstress, Lydia Rasmussen (http://www.snsraz.com/ModestSwimmingSuits/ ) is a homeschool graduate in Tucson that has devoted her energies to filling this need for modest swimwear. The suits are $30 (plus $10 shipping) regardless of the size and there are several patterns that you can choose from. Most modern swimsuits this day consist of less than a yard of fabric and cost at least this price- a modest swimsuit is a steal when you compare the price per yard! I ordered mine on a Monday and it was at my house by Wednesday. I am soooo excited to jump in the pool with my children and help teach Madison to swim this year.

Speaking of Madison and swimming…. She is doing a great job! We have had her taking lessons at Living Water Swim School this summer and after four weeks we can throw her in the pool and she consistently swims to the side to get out. We celebrated her “graduation” this past week and have some clips to share with you. Mickey Kindred and his daughter Brooke have such gentle dispositions with children and their love for Christ shines through in their work. Visit http://www.livingwaterswim.com/ to find out more. If you are in the Phoenix area and have time over the next few weeks, give them a call and get your child registered.

Here are clips of when she was thrown in fully dressed (complete with shoes) and was able to swim out successfully!

Oh Be Careful Little Eyes What You See….

2010-06-21T16:27:00.000-07:00

Over the past few weeks I have found my focus on media and what I allow myself and my children to take in whether it be through books, computer, television, or radio. We have always been fairly strict with television programming and have limited the viewing to DVDs that we have approved of. We never would dream of handing our children the remote control and allowing them to surf through the channels. We have also had a limit set to the time that they can sit in front of the television, which now consists of one family movie night per week and one or two half hour programs for the week totaling about 2 hours of television time a week. In the past we allowed a half hour program in the morning and an additional half hour in the afternoon which totals up to 365 hours of sitting in front of a screen every year! Since releasing the kids of this habit, I have found them to get more engaged in their indoor and outdoor play.

Just this past week, I decided that we needed to do some spring cleaning (I am a little late) and we tackled our video cabinet. When we cut back on the television time we also found that we were more selective about what was being watched. We have nearly every VeggieTales show that has been produced along with StoryBook and some incredible Living History productions all stemming from a Christian worldview perspective. Some of these are more worthwhile than others but we regard them as “safe.” But upon our cleaning we found shows that we once allowed such as “Bob the Builder” and “Thomas the Train” and the boys actually told me that we should get rid of them since they never talk about God in them. Wow- they are so right!

Our pastor shared a convicting sermon on media several weeks ago and he exposited on Psalm 101. I have pasted it here for you. Instead of just skipping over it, really read it through and we can talk more afterwards….

Psalm 101 (NKJV)
A Psalm of David.
1 I will sing of mercy and justice;
To You, O LORD, I will sing praises.
2 I will behave wisely in a perfect way.
Oh, when will You come to me?
I will walk within my house with a perfect heart.
3 I will set nothing wicked before my eyes;
I hate the work of those who fall away;
It shall not cling to me.
4 A perverse heart shall depart from me;
I will not know wickedness.
5 Whoever secretly slanders his neighbor,
Him I will destroy;
The one who has a haughty look and a proud heart,
Him I will not endure.
6 My eyes shall be on the faithful of the land,
That they may dwell with me;
He who walks in a perfect way,
He shall serve me.
7 He who works deceit shall not dwell within my house;
He who tells lies shall not continue in my presence.
8 Early I will destroy all the wicked of the land,
That I may cut off all the evildoers from the city of the LORD.

So, when my boys shared that we should get rid of the videos that didn’t talk about God, they were referencing this Psalm and particularly verses 3-5 and 7. Would I classify Bob the Builder and Thomas the Train as wicked? Not necessarily, but I would have to acknowledge that they are void of God. Life is portrayed as jolly and because there is no mention of God’s influence in the show then it is sending the message that He is not needed—what a lie (vs. 7).

Now, my children are young so I know that this is pretty basic but what happens when I take this Psalm and apply it to my own life? A friend sent me this short illustration and I look forward to the day when I can use it with my kids. For those of you that have older children I hope you enjoy using this during your devotional time. I wish that I knew who the author was but I don’t, if you do, please let me know so I can give credit.

Homemade Brownies Family Devotion

Last week, I walked into my office to find a sandwich bag on my desk containing three chewy, tasty, homemade chocolate brownies. Some thoughtful and anonymous person who knew my love for tasty homemade brownies had placed them there, along with a hand written short story. I immediately sat down and began eating the first chewy, tasty, homemade brownie as I read the following story:

Two teenagers asked their father if they could go the theater to watch a movie that all their friends had seen. After reading some reviews about the movie on the Internet, he denied their request.

“Come on Dad, why not?” they complained.

“The movie is rated PG-13, and we are both older than thirteen!”

Dad replied “Because that movie contains nudity and portrays immorality as being normal and acceptable behavior.”

“But Dad, those are just very small parts of the movie! That's what our friends who've seen it have told us. The movie is two hours long and those scenes are just a few minutes of the total film! It's based on a true story and good triumphs over evil, and there are other redeeming themes like courage and self-sacrifice. Even the movie review web sites say that!”

“My answer is no and that is my final answer. You are welcome to stay home tonight, invite some of your friends over, and watch one of the good videos we have in our home collection. But you will not go and watch that film. End of discussion.”

The two teenagers walked dejectedly into the family room and slumped down on the couch. As they sulked, they were surprised to hear the sounds of their father preparing something in the kitchen.

They soon recognized the wonderful aroma of brownies baking in the oven, and one of the teenagers said to the other, "Dad must be feeling guilty! Now he's going to try to make it up to us with some fresh brownies. Maybe we can soften him up with lots of praise when he brings them out to us, and persuade him to let us go to the movie he refused to let us see."

About that time I began eating the second brownie from the sandwich bag and wondered if there was some connection to the brownies I was eating and the brownies in the story. I kept reading...

The teens were not disappointed. Soon their father appeared with a plate of warm brownies, which he offered to his kids. They each took one. Then their father said “Before you eat, I want to tell you something: I love you both so much.”

The teenagers smiled at each other with knowing glances. Dad was softening. “That is why I've made these brownies with the very best ingredients. I've made them from scratch. Most of the ingredients are even organic.”

“The best organic flour. The best free-range eggs. The best organic sugar. Premium vanilla and chocolate.”

The brownies looked mouth-watering, and the teens began to become a little impatient with their dad's long speech.

“But I want to be perfectly honest with you. There is one ingredient I added that is not usually found in brownies. I got that ingredient from our own back yard. But you don't need to worry, because I only added the tiniest bit of that ingredient to your brownies. The amount of the portion is practically insignificant. So go ahead, take a bite and let me know what you think.”

“Dad, would you mind telling us what that mystery ingredient is before we eat?”

“Why? The portion I added was so small. Just a teaspoonful. You won't even taste it.”

“Come on, Dad; just tell us what that ingredient is.”

“Don't worry! It is organic, just like the other ingredients.”

“Dad!”

“Well, OK, if you insist That secret ingredient is fresh organic...dog poop.”

I immediately stopped chewing that second brownie and I spit it out into the wastebasket by my desk.. I continued reading, now fearful of the paragraphs that still remained.

Both teens instantly dropped their brownies back on the plate and began inspecting their fingers with horror.

“DAD! Why did you do that? You've tortured us by making us smell those brownies cooking for the last half hour, and now you tell us that you added dog poop! We can't eat these brownies!”

“Why not? The amount of dog poop is very small compared to the rest of the ingredients. It won't hurt you. It's been cooked right along with the other ingredients. You won't even taste it. It has the same consistency as the brownies. Go ahead and eat!”

“No, Dad...NEVER!”

“And that is the same reason I won't allow you to go watch that movie. You won't tolerate a little dog poop in your brownies, so why should you tolerate a little immorality in your movies?

We pray that God will not lead us unto temptation, so how can we in good conscience entertain ourselves with something that will imprint a sinful image in our minds that will lead us into temptation long after we first see it?”

I discarded what remained of the second brownie as well as the entire untouched third brownie. What had been irresistible a minute ago had become detestable. And only because of the very slim chance that what I was eating was slightly polluted. (Surely it wasn't...but I couldn't convince myself.)

Why Do We Tolerate Sin?

What a good lesson about purity! Why do we tolerate any sin? On the day of the Passover, the Israelites were commanded to remove every bit of leaven from their homes. A little bit of leaven or yeast makes the whole bowl of dough rise. Like leaven, even just a little bit of Sin contaminates the Christian (1 Corinthians 5:6, 7).

How often have I sat down to watch a romantic comedy and dismissed the fact that there was a couple that was engaging in premarital sex or the storyline included a homosexual couple on the side? I am ashamed by it! Hollywood has a mission to desensitize the viewers to moral issues by slipping them in. We don’t watch television programming but I have observed plenty while passing through a room where others are watching it and I am repulsed. Just today I walked past a television screen that someone dear to me was watching a soap opera on and I was shocked at what is now allowed on public (non-cable programming)- two men were in a deep passionate kiss!!! I literally felt like throwing up.

Why would we ever want to invite murder, rape, profanity, adultery, and other forms of evil into our homes like this and call it entertainment???? It is my prayer that I would never again see a violent act or profane image like I have seen in the past on the screen. It also is my prayer that my children would NEVER experience this filth to any degree. Is this being overprotective? No, it is loving my children as God loves me. If I embrace my Father and obey His Word then my spirit is able to be free from the bondage and stains of the world.

I am taking hold of those previously wasted 365 hours this year and using them intentionally. There are so many pleasant things that we can direct our attention to. Scripture memory and prayer always seem to be placed low on the totem pole, so I hope to move them up. We have fun playing a game of charades or going in the backyard to play outdoor games. A walk around the neighborhood or visiting friends is another favorite pastime. Tonight we had a blast washing the dog while I took full control of the hose and soaked everyone but myself—now that beats television any day! Maybe tomorrow we’ll make up a batch of pure unadulterated brownies, too!

Sewing Dresses Out of Recycled Shirts

2010-05-07T21:41:00.000-07:00

In this economy we are all having to tighten our belts and watch our spending more closely. Being on one income and that income being based on ministry donations often provides me with the challenge of using God's provision wisely. I was sharing some of the things that we have been doing to stretch our dollars with a friend and she mentioned that I should post these ideas to my blog. So, here’s the first idea for you. Having a little girl after two rambunctious little boys has been a delight! While I still wait for her hair to grow so I can braid it, I enjoy clipping in barrettes and bows and dressing her up in sweet dresses. There are challenges to this though- little girl dresses are not cheap and we don’t have anyone with a slightly older girl to take hand-me-downs from. So, taking my hobby of sewing and my desire to have more girly dresses resulted in these super cheap transformations.

Step 1: Raid your closet and take out any shirts that you haven’t worn for awhile and like the pattern. I have also been raiding my in-law’s Goodwill pile and Brad’s drawers for stock (sorry, honey!). We are going to recycle these shirts turning them into the cutest dresses.

Step 2: Find one of your daughters dresses and trace around it on the shirt using a pencil. If it is a button-down shirt, be sure to have it buttoned up and centered. Cut out the pieces. The button side will be the back of the dress while what was originally the back of the shirt will serve as the front of the dress.

Step 3: Place the right sides of the fabric together and sew along to make side seams leaving space for arm holes if you choose that type of dress. Otherwise, you can use scraps of fabric and elastic to make a little shoulder strap.

Step 4: That’s it! I am not a seamstress and am just a beginner. I love how easy this project is and how I can vary it with straps or arm holes. You can also add ruffles or lace for variety if you have that on hand.

These dresses take me less than an hour to put together from start to finish and cost me just a few cents depending on if I use elastic or ruffles. By the way you can also make pajama shorts by using old t-shirts. The boys love these since they are soft and comfortable. Have fun sewing!

I Am NOT Celebrating Easter!

2010-04-01T22:43:00.000-07:00

Why is it that Christians are celebrating the resurrection of Christ with these phrases or symbols associated with paganism?

• Easter
• Rabbit
• Easter Egg
• Traditional Easter Ham
• 40 Days of Lent (no-meat)

Stay with me for a quick lesson in the origins of the pagan Easter:
It starts way back in Genesis following the flood during the time of the tower of Babel. The Babylonians were corrupt and were worshipping the sun-god and the moon-goddess. The legend comes that Nimrod (Gen. 10:8-10) was elevated among the people as a god-man following his marriage to his own mother, Semiramis. When he died, they believed that he became the sun-god, Baal. His wife/mother took advantage of her position and claimed that she was a goddess who had been immaculately conceived and was born out of a moon egg during the first full moon of the spring equinox. Out of this deception, she gained the title “Ishtar” (pronounced “Easter”). The egg that she was born out of was labeled Ishtar’s Egg (pronounced “Easter’s Egg”). She begot a son named Tammuz who had a fascination with rabbits and was later killed by a wild boar. When he died, his mother Ishtar claimed that he was now with his father Baal and called for a time of mourning every year for 40 days prior to the date of his death. During this 40 day period, the people were not to eat meat. The empire that Ishtar built continues to evolve and the Babylonians now claim her to be the “Mother of God” and “Queen of Heaven”. She set up a schedule for the first Sunday after the first full moon after the spring equinox to be named “Ishtar Sunday” (pronounced “Easter Sunday”). During this celebration there were rabbits and eggs and a pig was slaughtered and eaten (in respect to the wild pig that killed her son).

It’s disheartening that we as the church blindly follow along with the culture and out of the risk of offending those that came before us or standing apart from the norm we continue to celebrate Easter. The Bible doesn’t even use the word Easter in reference to Christ’s resurrection! After gaining this knowledge, my family will work hard to refrain from using the word Easter when talking of this season and we will avoid the satanic symbols that have so deceptively taken over the true meaning of Resurrection Sunday.

Will we alienate those around us or shun them if they happen to use the word “Easter” or celebrate with the bunny or eggs? Absolutely not. It wasn’t until recently that I became enlightened as to the origin of this and it is my belief that the majority of those participating in it have no idea that the practice has bad roots. For those that are afraid that I am robbing the fun, keep in mind that I have no problem with doing a scavenger hunt, eating chocolate or even creating food art. I just don’t want these activities to be associated with Resurrection Day. There are plenty of other days for this without having to distract from the wonder of Christ’s resurrection.

What do we do? We celebrate! Jesus died on the cross for our salvation. That in and of itself is reason to get excited, but He didn’t stop there- He rose from the grave! How awesome is that? One of my favorite activities is making Resurrection Cookies or if I am short on time, Resurrection Rolls (http://www.dltk-kids.com/recipes/resurrection_rolls.htm). Here’s the directions for the cookies along with a Bible lesson:

Resurrection Cookies
• 1 cup whole pecans
• 1 teaspoon apple cider vinegar
• 3 egg whites
• pinch salt
• 1 cup sugar
• Plastic baggie
• Wooden spoon, rolling pin
• Tape
• Bible
Preheat oven to 300 degrees. (Do this before doing anything else.)
• Place nuts in baggie and beat them with a wooden spoon to break into small pieces. Explain that after Jesus was arrested and He was beaten by the Roman soldiers. Read John 19:1-3
• Open the vinegar and let everyone smell it. Put 1 teaspoon into the mixing bowl. Explain that when Jesus was thirsty on the cross, all He was given to drink was vinegar. Read John 19:28-30
• Add egg whites to vinegar. Eggs represent life. Explain that Jesus gave His life to give us life. Read John 10:10-11
• Sprinkle a little salt into each person’s hand. Let them taste it, then brush the rest into the bowl. Explain that this represents the salty tears shed by Jesus’ followers, and the bitterness of our own sin. Read Luke 23:27
• So far the ingredients are not very appetizing. Sprinkle a little sugar into each person’s hand. Let them taste it, then brush the rest into the bowl. Explain that the sweetest part of the story is that Jesus died because He loves us. He wants us to know and belong to Him. Read Psalm 34:8 and John 3:16
• Beat with mixer on high speed for 15 minutes until stiff peaks are formed. Explain that the color white represents our purity in God’s eyes because our sins are cleansed by Jesus. Read Isaiah 1:18
• Fold in nuts. Drop by teaspoons onto cookie sheets lined with parchment paper. Explain that each mound represents the rocky tomb where Jesus’ body was laid. Read Matthew 27:57-60
• Put the cookie sheet in the oven, close the door and TURN THE OVEN OFF. Give each child a piece of tape and seal the oven door shut. Explain that Jesus’ tomb was sealed. Read Matthew 27:65-66
• You’re done! Explain that you cannot eat the cookies tonight, but that you have to leave the cookies in the oven overnight. That might not make anyone too happy. Explain that Jesus’ followers were in despair when the tomb was sealed. Read John 16:20 and 22
• The next morning, open the oven and give everyone a cookie. Notice the cracked surface and take a bite. The cookies are hollow! On the third day, Jesus followers were amazed to find the tomb open and empty. Read Matthew 28:1-9
• Enjoy the cookies and relate to life’s daily blessings through God’s love and grace – noted especially on this holiest of days!

If you are interested in researching this topic out more for yourself, visit http://www.christiananswers.net/q-eden/edn-t020.html for more information.

The Magnifying Glass

2010-03-03T17:32:00.000-08:00

Recently I was talking with someone who proudly shared that he does not accept things at their face value, but rather questions everything said to him by others. Personally, I think it is wise to try to be discerning and question the statements and beliefs of others, but how often do we apply the same scrutiny to our own lives? It is far easier to evaluate the practices and beliefs of those around me than to take the magnifying glass and turn it on myself.
God’s Word is the ultimate measure for determining my standard. If I only compare myself to those around me then I am completely missing the mark. I am a sinner. My husband is a sinner. My family and friends are all sinners. The only one that I can and should compare myself to is Jesus—He was the perfect example.

From time to time, I challenge myself to take a chunk of time during the day to evaluate what I am doing. Here’s a brief look into how I look at what I am doing:

7:00 a.m. Wake up to children tugging on me. Hmmmmm….. Is there a better way? Could I arise before the rest of my family to spend some quiet time in prayer and meditate on God’s Word to set my day up? Sure I do this in the evening after they go to bed, but there are several passages that point out morning devotions.

7:15 a.m. Get dressed and ready. Are the clothes that I am wearing modest or distracting from who I am called to be? Am I putting on a mask to try to be someone else or am I embracing who God made me to be? Do I put care into my appearance or do I look sloppy and frumpy?

7:30 a.m. Make breakfast. Are the ingredients that I am preparing wholesome? Our food supply is so tainted here with pesticides and hormones. Not to mention all of the issues surrounding genetically modified foods (GMOs) which firmly go against God’s wishes (Deut. 22:9, Lev. 19:19, Gen. 1:11-12).

8:00 a.m. Eat breakfast. Was the prayer to bless the food sincere or just part of the routine? How did I do with teaching table manners to my children during this time? Was my mind present in this family meal time or was I purposefully distracting myself with a magazine or newspaper?

8:30 a.m. Clean up and school prep. When I was cleaning up from breakfast did I do it with a servant’s willing heart or was I grudgingly going through the task? For school prep, did I seek out God’s wisdom and ask for His insights while working with my children?

9:00 a.m. Start schooling. Why do I home school? I believe this is the best way to follow God’s direction for educating my children. While I am working on the math, reading, history, science, spelling and so on did I always have it center on God? When I was faced with a stubborn moment (or longer) from a child did I respond with patience and was I willing to put aside the academics to spend time on character training? Did I push through the science lesson just to move things along or did I take the time to allow my child’s curiosity to be fulfilled. When I was interrupted (this happens a lot right now in a house with 6 adults and 6 children under 7) did I handle it graciously or did I become bitter and resentful?

As you can see this was just a glimpse into just part of my day. If I continued this throughout the remaining hours in the day, I would most certainly come across areas that I need to evaluate. Is this easy? Absolutely not! It takes effort and energy, but I don’t want to blindly go along with the rest of the world. Instead, God has outlined very practical ways to live out our lives in the Bible, which is why it is the standard by which I examine mine.

My Heart Sings!

2010-02-12T10:53:00.000-08:00

My children know that I am overflowing with joy when I say “my heart is singing”. Whether it be the mastery of letter or number recognition or hearing peaceful play among my boys, I can find that my heart is singing out with thanksgiving to God. Music has always played an active part in my life between playing the flute in my high school years to the constant singing that I’ve done since I was much younger. We all have gifts that God has given us and my gift for singing has brought me delight and peace over the years. When I am able I will sing out loud as if no one else is listening and I find that I am truly communing with God. There is something about this practice that brings me to tears as I connect with my Savior.

Every night we sing as a family during our family worship time taking turns to pick out a favorite hymn or praise song. Some songs are upbeat and we are clapping and other songs cause us to be more reflective and concentrative on the words that we are singing. We have borrowed a couple of hymnals from our church and we have several Wee Sing Bible Song books and other praise music books that have provided us with endless selections. Here’s our current list of favorites:

Zachary— “In the Sweet By and By”
Jenn—“Be Thou My Vision" and "I’d Rather Have Jesus”
Madison— “Holy, Holy, Holy” and “Isn’t He Wonderful”
Jonathan— “I Will Sing Unto the Lord”
Brad—“A Christian Home” and “How Great Thou Art”

After several years of attending church services that have only sung modern praise music and recently being reintroduced to the “old” hymns, we have found that we are tremendously blessed to return to these. I am not one to jump on the bandwagon to battle out contemporary Christian music versus traditional Christian music, but I will share that I find it sad that so many in my generation have lost touch with the old hymns. I even had a conversation not too long ago with a friend that was searching for a church home and was investigating web sites and immediately dismissed any churches that offered traditional services because they wanted a cutting edge church experience. How disheartening it was for me to hear my friend abandon the old hymns that have been passed down from one generation to another in favor of songs that are often shallow theologically and tend to cater to our own emotions than to glorifying God.

Many of our children have never and will never sing a hymn of old which share deep spiritual truths. So, what can we do to preserve this heritage? First, find a biblically-sound church that offers a traditional or blended service and attend. Many of our former churches offered a traditional service but we found ourselves to be isolated as a younger family amongst an older generation. There is a wealth of wisdom that could be had if churches could integrate the different generations together. Unfortunately, music in church has shifted from a means to praise God corporately to a concert event where we find a church because we like the praise team. Personally, I find that the simple style of hymns prevent the temptation to get wrapped up in the tempo or tune of the song and my worship is more authentic. Again, I am not attacking all modern praise music, but I have observed a tendency to dumb down the message theologically, focus on the entertainment value of the music, and glorify the artist more than God. I haven’t seen many posters on the wall for Stuart K. Hine (composer for How Great Thou Art) but I have heard Top Ten Countdowns and Christian radio and seen many teens (and adults) screaming out with desperation to get the autograph of a contemporary artist. The praise is misplaced.

Another way is to sing these songs in your own home. No one in our home plays the piano (yet) so I use my music sight-reading skill and dig back to my childhood memories of hymns being sung in church to remember the songs from our borrowed hymnals. I have also discovered a great website that has thousands of songs with differing genres to listen to: http://www.hymnal.net/ I encourage you to give it a try and may your heart sing today!

Circle the answer: What’s the Meaning of Christmas for Your Child?

2009-12-24T15:25:00.000-08:00

A. Santa
B. Jesus
C. Presents

Upon having children, Brad and I suddenly got hit with the responsibility of making a decision for how we were going to handle the Santa-myth of Christmas. We began with Zachary just 6 months old and sitting on Santa’s lap thinking that we had time before we needed to make a decision. The following year, we made the decision that we would allow Santa in the home but the emphasis would always be on Christ and the gifts given would not be disguised as coming from Santa. For a couple of years we were blessed by a Christian man that dressed up as Santa and visited homes to collect donations for the local crisis pregnancy center. We welcomed him to our home and provided him with a book to read to the children about the true meaning of Christmas while having a birthday party for Jesus. Since moving from Prescott, we no longer have this Santa visit, but I assure you that the anticipation for Christmas is still full in our home.

Here are some of the ways that we have intentionally made Christ the center of Christmas for our family:

• We have chosen to give our children a historical lesson on Santa. We discovered an informative little board book, Saint Nicholas: The Real Story of the Christmas Legend by Julie Stiegemeyer and have used it every year. This book serves as an inspiration to reach out to those in need and partners well with projects like Angel Tree or Operation Shoe Box.

• There’s no Santa-myth in our home. Our children are fully aware that the man in the Santa costume at the mall is pretending to be Santa. They have no expectation that Santa is “keeping a list and checking it twice” nor do they anticipate that he is going to enter our home in the midst of the night bearing gifts. Why? We feel very strongly that we must be honest with our children. If I want them to believe the Bible and all of the happenings that took place within it (many of which seem far more outlandish than Santa flying across the sky with reindeer) then I never want to risk that they would equate my faith in God to be just another fairy tale like Santa Claus. Simply put- it is wrong for me to deceive my children when I expect truthfulness in all circumstances from them.

• When people ask “Are you ready for Santa?” or “Are you on Santa’s nice list?” our children politely reply “We are excited to celebrate Jesus’ birthday” or something similar in nature. It’s not in judgment or correction- just a simple answer that allows them to respond without having to create a confrontation. This also provides a great opening for presenting the gospel.

• Presents. We do exchange presents but it is not a huge event (at least in our immediate family). We don’t spend outlandish sums of money on brand-new toys. Rather, this year I found a couple of items for each of our children at the local thrift shop and wrapped them up. I have heard people gasp at the thought of giving a used present saying that it would be such a disappointment. If I ever see such displeasure in my children’s eyes when receiving a gift given out of love then I assure you that will be the end of presents. I value the fact that my children know how hard their father works to provide for our family. It is also important to me that when gifts are received from others outside of our family that the children acknowledge that and thank that person directly. What a great opportunity for teaching gratitude.

• Decorations. Zachary loves to prepare for any holiday and with the help of Jonathan the two of them typically take care of decorating the house with pictures that they’ve drawn. We also decorate a Christmas tree with ornaments that give reminders of Jesus (homemade dough nativity ornaments). The tree provides an opportunity to talk about how Christ was crucified on a tree to save us from our sins.

• Cookies. What would Christmas be like without sharing cookies? We enjoy making a set of nativity cookies for neighbors and friends attaching a little note about Jesus being the reason for the season. Handing out a gospel tract would work well with this too.

Christmas is a wonderful time of year- I treasure the anticipation as we celebrate the birthday of our Lord Jesus Christ. Merry Christmas to you!

Seasons

2009-11-03T20:47:00.000-08:00

To everything there is a season, a time for every purpose under heaven. Ecclesiastes 3:1

With the changing of seasons, we are able to experience cooler weather here in the Phoenix area. What a blessing that is for me! When I reflect on the seasonal shifts we have, I am reminded how God places our lives in different seasons as well. God grants us times in our lives that outline very specific responsibilities.

Young men and women in their teen years are in the season of preparation. It is their time to glean wisdom and learn new skills. As this foundation is established, the season changes and marriage typically takes place. Time passes and for many, babies begin to come. New fathers are called to provide for their families. New mothers have been literally handed the task to raise up that precious bundle like no other person in the world can do. It is a season to nurse and swaddle. As time goes on, the child’s growth and development alters the role of the mother in the day-to-day responsibilities but they stick together. The child continues to mature and eventually leaves home and the mother finds other roles to fulfill.

What breaks my heart is hearing frazzled mothers sharing how stressful life is when trying to juggle two seasons of life at the same time. Of course it is hard. I have been there. I recall when we conceived Zachary that there was no notion of my work ending. It seemed as though I had the perfect position as a preschool/ daycare director where I could enroll him in the Infant Room just down the hall from my office. Little did I know the bond between a mother and her newborn could be so strong. The separation was heart-wrenching with tears shed nightly wishing I could just stay with him. One of the worst moments I experienced was walking past the infant room and observing a trusted staff member spanking another baby. Of course, I took care of the situation with disciplinary action but that didn’t resolve my feelings of discontent.

Time passed and my husband was able to relocate us to a more affordable location to allow for my staying home. It was incredible! Zachary and I had wonderful moments together while God knit together his brother in my womb. I wish that I could share that my season of motherhood remained devoted but it did not. We found ourselves at a crossroads when Brad decided to leave his church position in order to direct a self-supported speaking ministry, which involved my taking on a career working from home. It seemed like the best of both worlds. I could work intensely during the naptime hours and stay up late at night to complete the work. It worked for a few years but the responsibilities grew and my pride swelled up as I found myself moving up the ladder in the organization. I quickly found myself excusing the fact that I was working 8-12 hours a day in our home office with the fact that I could just do it for a bit longer and then I would be able to cut back once the savings account had more cushion. My faith did not rest in God’s provision- it rested in my career. Not only that but I enjoyed the “attagirls” that I received from working. How often do children send their mom’s Target gift cards or bonus checks to show their appreciation?

As the days wore on with this hurried pace of working, cramming in homeschooling and managing the home as a wife and mother I found myself exhausted. I wasn’t enjoying anything because I was never in the moment. When I was schooling the kids, my mind (and sometimes my body) was going through all of the projects that I had for work. I could sit down and read aloud a book to the kids but not remember one word that I spoke since I was mentally in another corridor as my mouth spoke. I often said that I felt like I was running a marathon but never actually moved ahead.

Brad and I had several discussions on this and he often told me that I could quit working if I wanted to but I admit it was always my lack of faith and pride that kept me in the working world. I remember praying to God asking Him to make it plainly evident when/ if I needed to step away from work. Without going into all of the details, God granted my prayer and placed me in a very uncomfortable position that allowed me to release my grasp from the ladder of career advancement. It was a quick action to make but one that had been contemplated for years.

I have been full-time mama for about 3 months now and I feel so blessed. I am at peace in my role as mother. I no longer harbor the “mommy-guilt” or “career-guilt” or “wife-guilt”. God placed me in a season to care for my children and love my husband right now. Seasons come and go. I want to enjoy these days while I have them. When leaves begin to fall from the trees in autumn we can’t go around picking them up and pasting them back up on their branches just because we missed seeing them turn red. The same can be said of our children- I can’t reverse their growing up years. Seasons pass and new ones begin. May I always embrace the season that God has placed me in.

A Christian Family's Response to Halloween

2009-11-02T21:00:00.000-08:00

I think it is important to always evaluate what we are doing by asking questions like: Why do I do that? Is this lining up with God’s direction for my life? Does His Word support my behavior or condemn it? Halloween is one of those practices that caused me to dig deep into the Bible. Throughout my childhood and even in my early years of adulthood, I fully participated in Halloween with costumes, trick or treating, carnivals, and parties. I even bought cute little ghosts, goblins and jack-o-lanterns to decorate my home and yard.

Satan makes evil look good. While many in our culture today delight in blatant evil, Christians try to avoid evil. However, if it is disguised we can often be persuaded that it really isn’t that bad. For example, Mormonism has a squeaky clean image, which keeps the deception hidden away. Halloween follows suit—candy and costumes look fun and innocent but the origins are full of darkness and evil.

“And it shall be, when your children say to you, ‘What do you mean by this holiday?’ that you shall say…..” (Ex. 12:26-27).

In this passage, God instructed His chosen people to teach the purpose and history of the Passover to their children. Likewise, we should be ready to share with our children why we participate in certain holidays and their origins. We teach our children that the “real meaning” of Christmas is the birth of Jesus, the real meaning of Easter is the resurrection of Jesus, and Thanksgiving is about giving thanks to God for his provision (anybody remember the Pilgrims?) and is not intended to celebrate gluttony and pro-football. So, what are you going to say when your children ask you why you celebrate Halloween (or a substitute)?

Take a moment and research the history of Halloween. Type in Halloween origins into your search engine and discover the meanings behind the cute jack-o-lantern, the black cat, trick-or-treat, apple bobbing and costumes. It doesn’t take long to see that the origins are pagan and evil. Of course, I didn’t mention the other scenes that are commonly associated with Halloween- the ghosts, goblins, witches and other grotesque images- their evil influence is obvious and most Christians already have put a stop to allowing these in their homes. We have been tricked by the treats.

In a nutshell, Halloween is a pagan holiday that began with the Celts about two thousand years ago. Druids (Celtic priests) made bonfires, burned offerings of crops and animals to their deities, and people dressed up in animal skins to pacify the dead spirits that were thought to enter the world of the living on that day as well as to tell fortunes. Later, in the decades following Christ’s earthly ministry, the Romans had conquered much of the Celtic lands in northern France and England, so they added two of their own festivals to Halloween. One honored the dead while the other honored a goddess of trees and fruit. About 800 years later, Roman Catholics attempted to change the holiday to one that honored dead saints and martyrs. Halloween in America was limited in practice until the great influx of the Irish (a Celtic people) during the potato famine in Ireland. Today, Americans spend an estimated $7 billion on candy, costumes, and decorations, which makes it the second most lucrative holiday.

So, why is it that Christians participate in this day? I believe it is often due to our desire to “fit in” rather than to stand up for Truth and be different from the culture. We also excuse away our participation by calling it a “Fall Festival,” but still hold it on October 31. Some churches offer these festivals merely as cleaner alternatives while others have more righteous intentions by desiring to witness to the community, but how does the World see these activities? One pagan web site said that since Christian Churches can’t get their people to stop celebrating Halloween, they “sprinkled a little holy water on it” and “gave it a new name.” Is that what Christianity is all about? Do we wash things up a bit and continue to practice the things that are detestable to God? It is no wonder that young people are leaving the faith—there is no contrast between good and evil, just accommodation. When I read of Christ, I see a stark difference between who He was and the world around Him. I want to be an imitator of Christ rather than a clone of the world around me.

“Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children; and walk in love, just as Christ also loved you and gave Himself up for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God as a fragrant aroma. But immorality or any impurity or greed must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints; and there must be no filthiness and silly talk, or coarse jesting, which are not fitting, but rather giving of thanks. For this you know with certainty, that no immoral or impure person or covetous man, who is an idolater, has an inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God. Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of these things the wrath of God comes upon the sons of disobedience. Therefore do not be partakers with them; for you were formerly darkness, but now you are Light in the Lord; walk as children of Light (for the fruit of the Light consists in all goodness and righteousness and truth), trying to learn what is pleasing to the Lord. Do not participate in the unfruitful deeds of darkness, but instead even expose them; for it is disgraceful even to speak of the things which are done by them in secret. But all things become visible when they are exposed by the light, for everything that becomes visible is light.”—Ephesians 5:1-13

The Bible has plenty to say regarding the occult, sorcery, witchcraft and magic—we are to stay away from it (Deut. 18; 2 Kings 9; 2 Chron. 33:5-7; Micah 5:11-13; Nah. 3: 3-5; Gal. 5:19-21). In Acts 19, Paul visited Ephesus, which was a filthy city whose population practiced magic. Paul challenged them and instead of excusing away their behavior and getting angry with the message (and the messenger), many confessed their sin and burnt their magic books, so they could not practice again.

It has been several years since our family stopped participating in Halloween and its substitutes and I must admit that I experienced moments of doubt thinking “Am I being a Grinch?” or “Shouldn’t my kids have fun with everyone else?” Well, years later, I am convinced that my children are not suffering. They certainly have enough candy and have costumes for dress-up. Besides, we have had some wonderful times digging into God’s Word and delighting in being different from the world around us. It is a privilege. My children are learning that there are not always alternatives to what the world offers. Cigarettes are not an alternative to marijuana, kissing and touching are not alternatives to sex, and fall festivals are not an alternative to Halloween.

I know that this is a touchy subject, but I believe that churches need to come to terms on their reasons for holding “Fall Festivals.” I have attended several churches that offer these and while the title of the event refrains from Halloween it certainly reflects much of the holiday. Sunday School teachers pass out skull candy and jack-o-lantern pencils, there are slips of speech from the pulpit that use the word “Halloween” when inviting everyone to come, costumes are encouraged and it is held on October 31st. If it smells like a skunk and looks like a skunk, isn’t it really a skunk? I am all for a real Fall Festival that evangelizes the surrounding community, but to stand unique in Christ, I believe that such a time should take place on a different day, be absent of Halloween distinctives and delight in the fruits of the season that God has blessed us with. (Isn’t that what Thanksgiving is?) Why can't the church hold a wonderful community "Fall festival" or other outreach event a few weeks earlier or later and teach the congregation why Christians should not participate in Halloween. This sets us apart from the world as God's people while also allowing us to do an outreach event that is divorced from a pagan holiday.

So, what do we do on October 31? We have a typical day—nothing different from the norm. We do not dress up, we do not give out candy, we do not go to “Fall Festivals,” and we do not take our kids trick-or-treating. Are my kids suffering? No way!

Whatever He Does Is Right

2009-11-02T20:49:00.000-08:00

Catchy title, huh? Hang in there and you will come to understand..... I have enjoyed many freedoms and joys since stepping away from the working world and one of my most cherished is afternoon storytime with my children. All of our children have a rest time in the afternoon from 1:00-3:00. When I was working, I would rush to get everyone down and feel frustrated when things weren't progressing quickly enough. This rest time was my work time and I did not have time to delay. Now, I am embracing the preparation for rest time. I crawl up into bed with my kiddos and we read books. Today, we read one of Hans Christian Andersen's Fairy Tales, Whatever the Old Man Does is Right. I don't recall ever having heard this story while growing up and I imagine that it wouldn't be very popular in our culture today, but I loved it. Here's a link for an online copy of the tale: http://www.fairytalescollection.com/hans_christian_anderson/What_the_Old_Man_Does_Is_Always_Right.htm . In a nutshell, there is a poor couple who have few belongings including a horse. The old man decides that he wants to sell or trade the horse and his wife graciously answers "Whatever you decide will be right." From an outsiders perspective it appears as though the old man has utterly lost his mind as he goes through several trades and ultimately ends up with a bag of rotten apples. Even as he discusses his day with fellow travelers, they make a wager that his wife will get angry with him. He is confident that she will greet him with a kiss and support his decision. They go to the home and sure enough she is delighted with his trading and finds reason to support him. The men that wagered she would be upset paid the couple a bushel of gold coins because she praised her husband.

Such wisdom in a child's fairy tale! Most of us have been in a circle of friends and at least listened in as wives belittled their husbands. It is commonplace for women to bring to light the mistakes that their husbands have made and think it is lighthearted humor. Unfortunately, if the table was turned and we heard our husband's sharing our faults with their male companions our hearts would sting and cry out at the rejection. The Bible has several references to how a woman should guard her husband's integrity.

Proverbs 12:4 (New King James Version) ⁴ An excellent wife is the crown of her husband,
But she who causes shame is like rottenness in his bones.
Proverbs 31:11 (New King James Version)¹¹ The heart of her husband safely trusts her;
So he will have no lack of gain.
Proverbs 31:12 (New King James Version)¹² She does him good and not evil all the days of her life.

Of course, no one does right all of the time- the only man capable of such a thing was Christ, but it is not my place to point out faults endlessly. If I can encourage my husband and support him in his attempts to lead our family as Christ led the church then I am on the right path. It is my prayer that I can be like the little old lady in the fairy tale and stand by my hubby through the good times and hard ones placing my full confidence in him and his submission to God.

Don't Pop My Muscles!

2009-11-02T20:46:00.000-08:00

Whoever said that Family Worship had to be drudgery never really tried it. While most nights follow a pretty straightforward plan there are times when we add a bit more. This was one of those nights. We have been studying Samson this week and have had many discussions over how God had a special purpose for Samson's life and how Samson took the path of disobedience and fell into traps by associating with those that did not worship the one true God. We also discovered that despite all of Samson's shortcomings and the pain that he inflicted on himself that God was still able to use him for the original purpose of defeating the Philistines. Did it have to be this hard on Samson? Probably not. But how many times have I taken serious detours from the path that God laid out before me and yet through it all, God was able to create good from it?

My journey in and out of Mormonism is just one example of this. Just as Samson was tempted to engage in the company of those that didn't believe as he did, I also slid into deception. I chose to become deceived and trapped in a community that felt good, but was not based on truth. I experienced many hardships and challenges that I single-handedly brought upon myself. Today, I thank God for taking my past sin and turning it into an opportunity to share the truth with others (Rom. 8:28). There is hope and what a joy it is to watch others as they escape from Mormonism and come to truth.

Teach your children the doctrines of the Christian faith, read them the Bible and then spend time playing. For this study, we made spaghetti hair for a drawing of Samson's head, cut strips of construction paper and taped them to the inside of ballcaps and tucked balloons into a shirt to create muscles while play-acting the passage. We also used my favorite Betty Lukens Flannel Story pieces to retell the Bible passage- it is a great visual for children. Take some time and have fun laughing with your kids tonight! Here's a video clip of our time while re-enacting the passage of Samson: Don't Pop My Muscles!

Catechism In Our Home

2009-11-02T20:37:00.000-08:00

A few weeks ago (July 17-18th) I celebrated my birthday and spent the time attending one of my favorite events of the year--the AZ Families for Home Education http://www.afhe.org/ conference. This conference is solid and thousands of people come together to be challenged and encouraged while on the journey of raising up children for Christ. The main speaker of the event was Voddie Baucham. Voddie is a man of integrity that has a boldness to proclaim Biblical truth despite the conflicts that may arise. I appreciate his willingness to expose and demolish the strongholds of our culture even when it makes him unpopular in some circles. While I gained some new insights from Voddie, the one that I have already put into action was catechism for our children. I've shared previously that in our household we have daily Family Worship, which includes singing, Bible reading, application and prayer. Now, we have added practical training in the essentials of Christian faith (aka doctrine). I spend time drilling the ABC’s and math facts into my kiddos, but I have not taken that same amount of urgency and expectation when it comes to matters of faith. Here’s how we have decided to work through this and what a joy it has been to do!
There are several different catechisms you can use such as the Westminster Shorter Catechism or the Baptist Catechism. However, we use "A Catechism for Boys and Girls" because it is intended for younger children. Here's the link: http://www.reformedreader.org/ccc/acbg.htm
We purchased a set of three little books called Truth and Grace Memory Books published by Founders Press. In these books, they have broken down by age some suggested expectations for a child to learn as well as providing the catechism in print. Here’s the link in case you are interested: http://www.founderspress.com/shop/store.php?crn=205&rn=417&action=show_detail
Start asking questions and provide the answers. We have introduced one or two questions every night when holding our Family Worship time. Here’s the first three: 1.Q. Who made you? A. God made me 2.Q. What else did God make? A. God made all things 3.Q. Why did God make you and all things? A. For his own glory. The questions and answers are basic and fundamental. Even a 1 year old can do this!
Both Zachary and Jonathan eagerly ask for the question and answer time. Even our little Madison Grace has been able to learn bits and pieces! Children in our culture are bombarded by worldly influences that challenge the very core of Christ’s teachings. We have been called as parents to raise up an army for Christ. Deuteronomy 6:6-7 shares how we are commanded to teach our children God’s ways ALL day without pause. We have committed to doing this with our children- I know we will make mistakes, but with God’s grace and our determined efforts I am at peace as we equip our children. Here’s a video of our children while doing their catechism.

Who Am I?

2009-11-02T20:09:00.000-08:00

If I could listen to a recording of my voice on any given day I imagine that I would hear "Jonathan, be kind to your brother." "Zachary, stop teasing." and on and on. I am quite familiar with I Corinthians 13:5-8 which is summed up as the "Love Chapter", but I never turned it around to see how I or my children were measuring up to the perfect love that God demonstrates. So, this week I sat down with the boys and read this passage aloud to them. Then I changed the word "Love" to each of their names. Using the NIrV version was great for them as it was easy to read and understand. I typed it up and printed it out for each of them and it is now posted on their walls above their beds. Instead of telling them what to stop doing, I am now trying to ask them to consider whether or not they are being the "Jonathan" or "Zachary" that God wants them to be and going through the passage bit by bit to see if their behavior measures up. Here's the file if you want to use it. Simply click Ctrl F and type "Zachary" and click the Replace With tab and put in your child's name. I Corinthians 13

Zachary is patient. Zachary is kind.

Zachary does not want what belongs to others.

Zachary does not brag. Zachary is not proud.

Zachary is not rude.

Zachary does not look out for his own interests.

Zachary does not easily become angry.

Zachary does not keep track of other people’s wrongs.

Zachary is not happy with evil.

But is full of joy when the truth is spoken.

Zachary always protects. Zachary never gives up.

New Fish in the Sea

2009-11-02T14:28:00.000-08:00

After two weeks of lessons, the boys just graduated from Living Water Survival Swimming School. Their teacher, Mr. Mickey and his daughters were incredible while helping our youngest children overcome their fear of water. There were times when it was very difficult to watch the torture that our 4 year old was putting himself through. He was set on being afraid and there was no way to calm him. We prayed with him and just when we thought that he was ready to take on a lesson he would lose it again. This past Tuesday we finally had a breakthrough after working with him at home and being indifferent to the tantrums but forging ahead. He conquered the fear and began to jump in on his own. Today, he jumped in several times and was even thrown in a few times fully clothed. He also swam across the length of the pool. What a relief! His older brother was a champion and had no issues with learning to swim and his baby sister is still learning but she can pull herself to the side and hang on while moving to the steps. We work hard to teach our children that they must persevere through challenges for there is a reward at the end. Today we had a little pizza party at Peter Piper Pizza. A fun day!

Soldier for Christ

2009-11-02T14:24:00.000-08:00

This week my 6 year old son has been participating in Vacation Bible School and the theme is “SonRock Forest”. He has had a wonderful time. Yesterday was dress-up day and the directions for children was to “come dressed up in medieval attire. My first thought was AAAAKKKKK!!!! When was I going to find the time to create a costume for this in the next day? Well, God is good and after looking around the house I found that we had a dress-up shield and helmet that I had bought at the dollar store several months ago. I always want to make sure that faith is weaved in whatever we are doing and just because he is doing this for VBS doesn’t mean that the emphasis in his mind is on God. There has been a lot of talk about Robin Hood, shooting arrows and water play so I knew that this was an opportunity to take him to God’s Word. Here’s what I did- we read Ephesians 6:10-17 and the costume was underway.
10 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might. 11 Put on the full armor of God, so that you will be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil. 12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places. 13 Therefore, take up the full armor of God, so that you will be able to resist in the evil day, and having done everything, to stand firm. 14 Stand firm therefore, HAVING GIRDED YOUR LOINS WITH TRUTH, and HAVING PUT ON THE BREASTPLATE OF RIGHTEOUSNESS, 15 and having shod YOUR FEET WITH THE PREPARATION OF THE GOSPEL OF PEACE; 16 in addition to all, taking up the shield of faith with which you will be able to extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. 17 And take THE HELMET OF SALVATION, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. NASB
While no prizes were awarded for this costume, the time that I spent on this and reading God’s word together with my son was priceless. Once finished I was duplicating it for his brother. Watch out world …. two more soldiers for Christ are out there!

Father's Day Gift

2009-11-02T13:52:00.000-08:00

I just discovered Wordle. It is so much fun and I am realizing all of the possibilities for gifts. Right now, the focus is on Father’s Day for my own Dad and for my husband, but this would be perfect for a graduate, pastor, boss, friend. Really, who wouldn’t want a personal, heartfelt gift for any occasion? Here’s what you do:
Go to http://www.wordle.net/ and Click on Create at the top.
Type in a list of words that you want to include. I chose to go with descriptive nouns but you could do anything. Hint: if you have a name that includes two words you will want to divide them with a ~. This will provide the space and keep the word together.
Click “Go”
The system will randomly generate a “Wordle”- you can change it up manually using the Font/ Layout/ Color options at the top or you can scroll below the picture and click “Randomize” and it will create something new. Keep in mind that if you like something, print it before losing it. There is no guarantee that you will get it back again.
Print on cardstock or photo paper.
Matte and Frame.
Here is a copy of the on-screen Wordle that I created for my Dad. I asked my sister and mom to share some descriptive nouns to add more variety.

Here is the final product after buying a frame at the dollar store:

Kids in Church?

2009-11-02T13:50:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was Sunday and for most of us that is the day that we attend church services with fellow believers. We are in transition right now and trying to find a church home in the Phoenix area. We have visited two churches in the past month and both have been positive experiences. We have chosen to keep our children in the service with us to allow our family to worship together. Based on past professional and personal experience we have found the "silo" ministries to be less effective. I realize that is a blanket statement and there are certainly situations that where age-segregated classes have had positive results. In our experience though, we have found many benefits to keeping the family united while attending church.
How do you handle three children ages 6,4 and 1 in a church service? I must admit that I asked that same question when we began this adventure and through some bumpy attempts found some ways that work better than others. We discovered that it needs be basic and simple. I first prepared for Sunday with a backpack of activities that the kids could choose from complete with magnets, coloring books with crayons and pencils, baggies of Bible felt stories and children's Bible picture books, snacks and drinks. First off- the backpack was incredibly heavy and while we were just a family of five we took up a huge amount of space in the row. The other drawback to this approach was that the kids were not engaged in the service- just occupied. They would interrupt us constantly to switch from one activity to another- crayons dropped, they had squabbles over who got what. It was hard. Now, we have simplified matters and we bring a plain spiral notebook, pencil and a children's Bible for every child. We also have a small baggy with dry cereal and raisins for each kiddo. There are a couple of expectations we hold. When the congregation is singing, we all sing so the notebooks and Bibles are not used. When we are praying, we all pray. During the sermon, our 6 year old is expected to listen closely and we guide him to the passage in his Bible to read along. He can also draw pictures and take “notes” but it needs to be related to the sermon. For our 4 year old, we are a bit more flexible. He can look at his Bible and may draw pictures so long as he is quiet and not distracting. Our 18 month old is often the most challenging as she is being trained in sitting in one place and being quiet. She does great the majority of the time, though. We have practice sessions at home every night during Family Worship. She is expected to sit next to me and can hold a small doll, look at a Bible book or color with her pencil in her notebook. The snack baggie is very helpful in keeping her hushed during the sermon.
The question often asked- what are they getting out of church when it is geared to adults? You will be amazed at what children can learn even when we don’t dress it up with bright colored bulletin boards and relay races. Don’t get me wrong- those are fun and I do plenty of that at home, but it is also important that children come to approach the Bible and worship in it’s most basic form. It is such a joy to be able to talk as a family about the sermon and further explain what was taught to our children at home. I can also be assured that the content presented to my children is sound and not misinterpreted by a well-intentioned volunteer. Awhile back, my husband and I were sitting in an adult Sunday School class while our children were off in their own classes when we spied on the wall of the multi-use room “Consequences for Misbehaving In Children’s Church”. There were three or four consequences beginning with the basic “time out” and progressively getting worse. Can you guess what the ultimate punishment for misbehaving in children’s church was? “You will be sent to big church and sit with your family.” Ouch! Is this what I want my child to think of when he/she is faced with the time to attend church? This is not a new concept, rather it is just a return to the good ol’days. Many churches are popping up that are considered “Family Integrated”. I would be thrilled to be a part of one of these churches but in our area the only Family Integrated Church has taken on some legalist tendencies. As the pastor shared in his sermon on Sunday, there are some issues that are critical and inflexible when it comes to the Church. Worshipping as a family is simply a preference for us and not an issue that should split believers.

Naptime- Immerse Them in the Word

2009-11-02T13:49:00.000-08:00

Naptime is very important at our house. Because both my husband and I work from the home full-time and we need to have some quiet and uninterrupted time to work as professionals. I often spend the time from 1:00-3:00 in crunch mode and use the time very efficiently. This is my chance to make phone calls where the recipient on the other end has no doubt that they are a priority to me. Not only is this time important for our work but it is even more vital to the kiddos.
We use naptime to immerse the kids in God's Word using an audioBible that we downloaded free from http://www.faithcomesbyhearing.com/store/languageconfig. We use the Kidz NIV version which is great- the boys take turns on the Bible passage that they choose to listen to. We have about 1-2 hours worth on each CD so even if they don't fall asleep (they almost always do) then they are still absorbing the Bible. This has been one of the most effective tools that we have used to disciple our children. Super easy and affordable. We have found that the boys have memorized large chunks of the Bible as a result of this.

Family Worship- What Is It?

2009-11-02T13:46:00.000-08:00

Our family has a nightly practice that we have coined "family worship". Of course we are not the only family out there to use the phrase but we all have a unique method. Here is a glimpse into our nightly routine. We begin the time singing songs out of several well-used songbooks. The WeeSing Bible and WeeSing More Bible are excellent for young children. Each child gets to choose a couple of songs. We have lots of variety and action during our song time- arms are flailing at times so watch out! Our final song is B-I-B-L-E which transitions us to Bible time where Daddy pulls out The Picture Bible and the boys sit by his side while he reads them a passage. They discuss the reading and it's application to their lives. During this time, I sit with our little girl who has her own picture Bible to flip through. This keeps her occupied and involved while not distracting the boys. (It is also great practice for her to be able to sit quietly for church). Following the reading, each of the boys prays aloud "Thank you God for..... I am sorry God for..... Please help me with......" We conclude our time with two more songs: "He's Got the Whole World" and "Jesus Loves Me" personalized for our family members. This is a typical night for us but as you will see in future posts, I try to find time to add extra touches to the time with flannelgraphs, thematic snacks and crafts.